Shared Parenting Business – 6 Top Tips to Support Shared Parenting After Separation

‘He doesn’t really want to share the care of the kids; he just wants to get at me!’

‘She doesn’t see what this is doing to the kids; we don’t communicate any more…’

‘We were doing fine with sharing the kids’ care till I re-partnered…’

Familiar words from separated or divorced parents – as a family dispute resolution practitioner, I hear stories of bitter disputes over shared care, child support and post-separation parenting issues. Parents may be caught up in their own pain, and anger with each other, when the separation is still raw and recent. Or perhaps parents made relatively amicable parenting arrangements, which worked well for years until one parent began a new relationship. Suddenly all hell broke loose and now the separated parents can’t seem to ‘go along to get along’ any more.

Reframe the picture

If this picture looks all too familiar to you as a separated parent, it might help if you reframe it. Instead of grappling with the idea of managing a personal relationship gone sour, picture this: your post-separation parenting is a business, in which you and your former partner are job-sharing the manager’s position.

Assets or liabilities on a balance sheet may not seem to have much in common with your toddler’s tantrums, or your teenager’s demands to go to that all-night party. How can a business model help you with the emotional highs and lows of day-to-day life as a separated parent? Lynn Grodzki, a business coach for therapists in private practice, talks about ‘nurturing’ your business like a parent. Well, I’m suggesting that you nurture your parenting like a business. To do that, you have to do some forward planning!

The importance of planning

It is often said that when we fail to plan, we plan to fail — and in an economic downturn, businesses must plan carefully to manage risk. Lynn Grodzki describes ‘risk reduction’ as the process of evaluating the dangers and then taking steps to minimise the losses or potential losses to your business. As a separated parent, you can do the same, and here’s how to set about it. (The following tips are loosely based on Lynn Grodzki’s advice to business owners.)

Six Top Tips to Reduce Your Parenting Risks after Separation

1. A written ‘business plan’ – having a written parenting plan or agreement can help you to co-manage the business of parenting after a separation. A business plan allows you to review your business practices and goals. A parenting plan allows you to track what you have both agreed to do as parents.

2. Maintain a cash reserve for operating expenses – this is often easier said than done in difficult economic times, both for businesses and for parents. However, in both cases it pays to save when you can. And just as ‘goodwill’ is important in business, it is also important in parenting. Business owners can put a dollar value on ‘goodwill’, and know how important it is for long-term sustainability. As co-managers of parenting, both parents can build up shared reserves of ‘goodwill’ in how they co-operate as parents. That may give you both some ’emotional capital’ to draw on in the tough times (see Tip 4).

3. Good record keeping – many a business has come to grief through poor record-keeping. Your co-parenting business will benefit from good written records. Many parents find it useful to use a communication book that passes back and forth as children move from one household to the other. (This avoids the risk of passing messages via your children. Remember, the children are not the managers in this business!)

4. Contingency planning: average your profit and loss over time – you may have heard of amortizing or depreciating a business cost. That happens when the cost of an actual or intangible asset is averaged, or written off, over a period of time. As co-managers of parenting, you and the other parent may have many years of co-parenting ahead of you, until your children are independent adults. It takes stamina to sit with the discomfort of the difficult times, when you may feel that you are ‘trading’ in a hostile environment. It is worth remembering that times can and will change.

5. Self care when the business depends on you – the business of co-parenting relies on the ability of each parent to give time and energy to their responsibilities. To do that, and to take care of others, you must take care of yourself. A healthy diet, appropriate exercise, enough sleep, and keeping in touch with your doctor for regular check-ups as required; these steps will help you to manage the risks of ill health.

6. Keep up your insurance – some business partners maintain ‘key person’ life insurance on each other, if the loss of a business partner could affect the financial security of the business. You can also view your ability to co-operate as parents as ‘insurance’ for your business. The more effectively you can co-parent, the less risk there is of your co-parenting business ceasing to trade.

Of course, you should also take legal and financial advice on your individual situation, as necessary. However, these business tips might help you to keep your co-parenting business afloat in troubled times, and protect your children from exposure to conflict between their parents.

How to make these tips work for you!

*Family dispute resolution is a mediation process that can assist you and the other parent to talk about your parenting issues and to make a written parenting agreement. A family dispute resolution practitioner can help you both to identify the issues and to focus on the best interests of your children.

*A parenting agreement might include issues such as the time spent with the children by each parent; communication; transport arrangements; school holiday arrangements; special days such as Christmas, Easter and other significant family or religious occasions.

*Emails and text messages are useful as written records. If you make verbal arrangements with the other parent, confirm them in a polite text message or email, just as you would do in a business setting. It all helps to avoid costly last-minute misunderstandings.

*’Write off’ some emotional costs over time. If you could enter all the ‘intangible assets’ of co-parenting over the next five years, as your children grow, your parenting balance sheet might show a profit for your children over time. Try keeping a journal, or use the expressive writing exercises described by Dr James W. Pennebaker in his book ‘Opening up: The healing power of expressing emotions’.

*Self care: enroll in a new activity group, or take an adult education class. The ‘down time’ from parenting may replenish your spirits and give you more energy. If you are feeling depressed, anxious or angry, talk to your doctor, who may recommend other supports such as counseling or medication.

Tips to Finding the Top Security Companies to Protect Your Home or Office

Choosing a security company can be a daunting experience. You want to choose a high quality company with years of knowledge and security to ensure your assets are protected in the event that someone tries to break in. At the same time, you don’t want to break the bank, but it is important to take the following recommendations into consideration to ensure you choose the best security companies to meet your particular requirements.

The first step to finding a security company is to shop around. You want to find a selection of companies offering security services in your local area. This provides you with the ability to review each company, learn as much as you can about them and then compare them against each other to find the perfect match to meet your particular home or office needs.

The next step is to get written quotes. When it comes to a security company you may have a list of things you want taken care of. This may be everything from the supply and installation of alarm systems to providing you with a security guard. You may even want to include armed response. Whatever you are looking for, get it in writing to ensure that you have the quote in black and white, making it easier when you sit down to compare the companies.

Ensure the quotes you receive provides you with a price, the services and products included and anything else you requested. This may be the duration of the contract along with any fees for early cancellation. Having quotes is a great way to find out more about what you can have to protect your home.

With the quotes in front of you, you can now start comparing the companies by going through the written quotes and identifying those that offer you more for your money. Be wary of companies that charge too much or seem to quote way below the others, the quotes should be similar in price. Going through these together can help you eliminate some from the list. You may feel one is a little too high for your budget, but the others fall into line.

Once you narrow down your search, do your research. Go online and search through the independent review sites and online forums, learning as much as you can about each of the security companies you have received quotes from. You will be amazed, but this particular process can help you narrow down your search considerably.

Check with the company that they screen and check all their employees that work for them. It’s easier to pick up the phone and speak to a real person on the other end of the line, rather than relying on the internet alone. You want all the security personnel to be vetted and checked, putting your own mind at ease that you have made the right decision.

Once you are completely satisfied with your choice then ask for a contract. Read the contract with a fine tooth comb. Go through every line and ensure you are happy with the contents and that you understand the contract before putting pen to paper.

If the security company you have chosen is supplying any of the products, then you will want to ensure that they provide you with a good warranty, protecting you against defects and installation.

In addition to this, ensure the company is licensed. The main priority is to ensure that they have the right licenses in place to supply and install the products for you keeping your property safe and secure at all times.

Top 5 Cloud Security Tips You Need To Know

This article gives five tips to enhance your cloud account security. It gives tips that are appropriate to various records, not only your cloud account, from email records to online cash accounts. The article clarifies a tiny bit about how your security might be broken and how you can make it harder to rupture.

Guarding an online record, for example, the cloud from programmers or savage power programs does not need to be a challenging task. Here are five tips that you can begin utilizing immediately as a part of request to expand the security of your online records. Simply little changes to the way you do things online can possibly enhance your online security an awesome arrangement. The way you deal with your records and your passwords will make it either less demanding or harder for a programmer to access your online records.

Change Your Password Like Clockwork

This is accomplished for various reasons. Firstly, you have to change it routinely for security reasons, and like clockwork implies that it is not an accommodation, but rather it additionally makes it harder for programmers as they need to begin without any preparation each time you do it. You should likewise recollect that ex representatives may attempt to control your framework, and changing your secret word no less than at regular intervals will stop this.

Monitor Your Email With Neurotic Energy

It might be utilized to pick up control of verging on each record that is connected to it, which incorporates your cloud administration, so you should be exceptionally watchful and cautious about your email security. You ought to begin by changing the watchword for your email address each time you utilize your email on possibly powerless system.

Passwords With Real Words In Them Are The Slightest Secure

An excessive number of individuals still utilize words in their passwords, and programmers, digital lawbreakers and animal power projects are continually going to attempt them first. They even attempt anecdotal words, names, spots and content talk. Words in your secret key are going to make it less secure and less demanding to hack.

Some Records Will Enroll Upper And Lower Case

On the off chance that the records do, then you should utilize upper and lower case letters in your secret key. It makes your passwords a considerable measure more grounded, as the programmer needs to attempt much more blends before at long last splitting your secret word. Try not to put the capitalized letters close to the front of your secret word since they won’t be as powerful.

Just Utilize A Mystery Answer Once

A few programmers will get into your cloud account by means of the indirect access and will attempt to reset your secret word. This is particularly valid if your email location is hacked. In this way, you require the make it as hard for the programmer as would be prudent and never utilize the same mystery answer more than once. On the off chance that one site requests your mom’s last name by birth then give it. On the off chance that another requests your mom’s original surname (as a mystery question), then give an erroneous answer and recollect what it was. Then again, you can record the mystery answer, just insofar as you place it in a safe.

Home Security – Six Top Apartment Security Tips

As recently as eight years ago home ownership was at an all-time high. Part of the reason for that of course was government intervention. Democrats came to the conclusion that home ownership was a right of everybody and it was government’s job to help everybody get a home. So they did away with the traditional requirements of getting a mortgage.

They made it so easy to get a home that people who had no business getting a home got one anyhow-thank you federal government!

This ultimately led to the collapse of the housing market led by literally millions of foreclosures on those same homeowners.

Most of these homeowners were then forced out of their homes. They needed a place to stay. So an unintended consequence of all this has been a rise in the demand for apartments.

Apartment complex owners are enjoying record high occupancy rates.

For those people who live in an apartment complex, they may develop a false sense of security. It is true that more and more complexes have made it more difficult to gain entry, there still hundreds of thousands of them where there is no secondary security point of entry. There is your front door and that’s it!

Every week I read or hear about an apartment dweller who is accosted by a complete stranger. There are several things that apartment dwellers can do to improve their security even if the apartment complex owners won’t.

Several of these tips apply to homes as well. They have been proven over time to be the most effective. So here are the top six apartment security tips to improve your apartment security.

1. Lock your door even when you’re at home. I always suggest that you use some kind of an alarm, preferably a wireless security system. That way if someone breaks in, especially when you’re not there, your neighbors will know.

2. Lock your windows even when you’re at home.

3. Change the locks on your front door. As a new apartment owner you are given keys to your place. You have no idea how many other keys there are floating around. Even if you have to pay for the keys it is worth it for the peace of mind.

4. Don’t develop a false sense of security. Just because there may be an extra security point in your complex, they are not foolproof.

5. Apartment complexes are notorious for shaving costs, especially when it comes to lighting. They are notorious also for poorly lit parking garages and areas in between buildings. The bad guys love darkened areas

6. And lastly, if you don’t have a peephole in your front door, demand that you get one. You should never open your front door unless you absolutely know who is there.

Follow these six apartment security tips then get some home alarms including a wireless security system and you will be way ahead of the game.